Archive for May 19th, 2009

How do comedians sleep at night knowing that there are people out there who are far funnier than they could ever be – and don’t even know it?

Tough call on which of the trio is best (we’ll discount the girlfriend trying to shut her boy up), but the award probably has to go to the freshly inked racist with the wasted Brains impersonator and British Tom Clancy fan tied for silver.

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Don't fight it, big man

Don't fight it, big man

A few days after discovering Jae and Myles, the young men regularly shifting musical equipment to and from the neighbouring house in the street in the town he’s now from, were Laffer and Wootton of The Panics, Bruce returned home from Nick Cave’s thunderous Palace gig and spied lights on.

“You’re in for a treat at All Tomorrow’s Parties,” wrote Bruce in a text. “Cave was awesome tonight.”

Minutes later, as he prepared for bed, came the reply.

“Have you got any booze?”

A bottle of red twinkled tantalisingly from the kitchen, questioning whether Bruce really did have to be alert for the following day and whether he really needed a huge amount of sleep before Spiritualized’s Hifi gig.

Seconds later, there was a knock at the door. There was Jae and the remnants of a six-pack. 48 hours earlier, Bruce had carried out a brief interview with the singer over the kitchen counter (how rock ‘n’ roll) in an attempt to fast track an article into Clash magazine in the UK ready for the Panics’ imminent arrival to hawk Cruel Guards.

Much of the conversation that followed on the sofa was far more entertaining than what had been included in the article but, figuring some things were best kept for the sofa at 3am rather than wider public consumption, the article remained unchanged. Clearly not all journos feel the same, with this appearing in the Sun to coincide with the release of Don’t Fight It in the UK.

Admittedly, the full story of that night hasn’t been told (and one detail in particular appears to have been changed…!). Still, wouldn’t mind being a fly on the wall of the Blackburn changing room this weekend as one of football’s self-styled hard men faces his players…

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